Potty Talk

A couple of people have asked for a new post but I've been so busy doing nothing and everything that I'm just now finding a minute to write. I was inspired today when I saw our "potty tongs" in the garage and knew I had found my next subject. So hold on to your hats people, you are in for a real treat.

Awhile back - it could have been last October or it could have been January, because frankly I've lost all track of time - Turtle called out to me, "Mommy, I dropped my clippie in the potty!" Things occasional fall in the toilet around here; even Mr. Lovey has had a swim in the potty, so I just braced myself and went in. I took a look and there, directly underneath what was surely the biggest poop Turtle has ever produced, was a hair clip laying deep inside the pot. This was my cue to declare the bathroom off limits and send Turtle after Twin Daddy. If he hadn't been home I would have just locked up the bathroom and waited for him because I simply couldn't deal with it.

After he evaluated the situation and thought about it for awhile, he found some old tongs in the kitchen and proceeded to fish out the hair clip while I hid in my bedroom trying not to vomit. I assumed he threw the tongs in the garbage along with the clip, but he wisely washed them carefully and put them in the garage for "next time." And there has already been a "next time" where he had to fish out half a roll of soggy toilet paper clogging up the same toilet. The man thinks ahead, is all I'm saying. And every time I see those potty tongs, I'm proud I had the foresight to marry him.

We've had a lot of potty drama around here in the last couple of weeks, from a vomit-and-fever-producing stomach virus hitting each of the girls to a colonoscopy for Twin Daddy to remove a benign polyp. But potty humor is also very hip these days, with "poo poo" being the punch line of most of the "jokes" the girls try to tell. So tonight at bedtime Monkey kept telling me Knock Knock jokes with the Knocker being some version of "poo poo," like "Poo poo li do di." "Poo poo li do di who?" I asked. "Poo poo li do di Poo Poo!" After a few inane rounds of that, I tried to teach her, "Banana, Banana Who, Banana, Banana Who, Orange, Orange you glad I didn't say Banana?" She just stared at me blankly. The girl can sing all the words to Edelweiss but she just didn't get the joke. So I said, "Orange Poo Poo!" instead, and she shrieked with laughter.

I hope for your sake that I'll be inspired by something less vulgar next time I blog. But then it won't be nearly as interesting, will it?