Twin Momma Do's and Don'ts

I don't have any overwrought emotional tales to share this week, so I thought I'd go very light. Here is my official list of "6 Do's and Don'ts for Handling a Twin Momma"

1. Do open the door for her when you see her coming. Yes, she is perfectly capable of pushing her double stroller through the door with one hand while holding the door open with the other, and she’s got the biceps to prove it. But it wears her out. Same goes when you see her coming your way carrying a baby in each arm. She can probably open the door without even putting a baby down, but if she could breeze through without that extra effort it might ease her exhaustion. Open the door even when she says, “I’ve got it!” with a happy, independent smile on her face. She desperately needs help and is just faking her chipper attitude. She could never make it through the day without the kindness of strangers.

2. Do compliment her adorable children. Every momma thinks her baby is the most beautiful on earth, and twin mommas are no exception. She just happens to have two children tied for most beautiful on earth. The praise you lavish on her and her children will give her a boost of happy energy to get her through the next hour.

3. Don’t use a fully functioning double “car” cart at the grocery store if you have only one child. I can’t stress enough how her blood will boil if she has to put her twins in a car cart that is missing a steering wheel, while your single child enjoys the luxury of two steering wheels.

4. Don’t ask which side of the family the twins came from. It’s a little embarrassing to explain fertility drugs to a perfect stranger. And some twin mommas get downright irate at this question. She also doesn’t want to hear about your uncle’s cousin’s daughter who has twins. Yes, she knows people are fascinated by twins. But she only cares about hers, so just tell her they are beautiful and move along (See #2).

5. Don’t state the obvious. If the babies look nothing alike; if one is a blond and the other is a brunette; if one looks like her mother and the other looks like the stork brought her, you can bet the twin momma already knows this. There is no reason to exclaim it aloud, adding, “Well don’t that just beat all!” or “Have you ever seen such a thing?” You’re giving all three of them a complex.

6. Do recognize that she is often an object of curiosity and she may or may not enjoy the extra attention that her twins bring to her. She may have answered the question you just asked or heard the observation you just made three times that day already. So try not to be offended if her answers are short or she doesn’t chat with you as long as you’d wanted. She’s doing her best to be a good twin momma ambassador but sometimes, she’s just tired. In any event, open the door as wide as you can, give her a big smile, and tell her she’s going a great job with those beautiful children. You will absolutely make her day.